Friday, May 30, 2008

D'banj at Peace Rally in Niger Delta

This is too MAHD!

We are very impressed

Friday, May 23, 2008

Baz Luhrmann - Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen)

This advice works over a decade after it was given

tosynCONTRADICTION sent you a video!

Here's a video for all you blog lovers to enjoy!

It is a recording of one of my DAD's live performances

Can u believe it?

My father was the first singer to incorporate dancers as part of his live performances

Look at those dancers go!

© 2008 YouTube, Inc.

Saturday, May 17, 2008

Women in Entertainment

Why aren't there as many prominent female artistes as there are male ones?
Why aren't female comedians as well-known as their male counterparts?
Why does it seem that even in the entertainment industry, the great gender divide persists?

Well, i am a female in this entertainment industry.
On one hand, i am a writer who writes for a National newspaper and various magazines. As such, i get to cover all kinds of information, including entertainment.
Also, i have a music persona, CON.tra.diction, who is a singer / songwriter.
And lastly, i own my own companies that one way or the other, deal in entertainment currency. s.h.a.r.e is a social network, SPEECHgirl is a media and entertainment company, and Elenu Gba N Gba is a PR firm targeted specifically at celebrities and the red carpet!

I therefore feel i am a tad bit qualified to speak about what it means to be a female in this industry.

Is it that we are now as hard working as our male colleagues?
Is that we do not have a level playing field?
Why are we SEEMINGLY not as successful as the guys?

To be honest, i would never be in a discussion where i would ever say that women are not as hardworking as men.
So that would not be my take on the matter.
Instead, i would point out some things that may seem simple, but mean a lot.

It is a man's world; abi?
Which is why there are so many double standards.
Which is why, when a man sleeps with a hundred women, he is a stud, but when a woman sleeps with ten men, then she is a slut.
So, imagine a guy and a girl in the same industry, trying to handle the neccessary social networking that occurs. Sooner or later, the girl is going to be viewed with a certain level of disdain.
And of course, if a guy has to flirt with some women to get some work done, then he is charming.
The girl flirts?
or at least, TEASE.

And for music, how about lyrics and videos?
A guy talks about sex.
yeah, whatever.
A girl does and it's probably cause for a constitutional conference.
A guy has half naked girls dancing in his videos...
Cool vid dude.
A girl is half nude in her vid
Does she not have parents???

So, artistes have to do the craziest things to get their music out.
We record all night in the studio, we perform at shows that end at 4am, we go on road trips.
Well, at least, we try to.
Let us be honest; how many girls are going to get the permission (from parents, boyfriends, husbands, and even SOCIETY) to stay in a studio overnight, 'recording', to come back home at 5a.m after a show, to travel out of Lagos all the time?
For a long time, that did not occur to me cos my folks are pretty liberal. But i started gisting with some other female artistes (and this applies in journalism and other aspects as well oh) and opened my eyes sharp sharp!

Let us face it, guys can be... Bad.
And this is me putting it real mad; i am actually thinking of another 'b' word. But this is a P.G rated blog.
True story.
My friend records a song and gets signed to a management company.
The owner of the firm is friends with some guy who is in some company that organises shows a lot.
So this guy says, 'Do me a favour, let my girl perform at the show'.
And the FRIEND says, 'Sure, but the girl SEXY so i have to sleep with her first'.
I found this story to be so painfully funny.
I mean, COME ON
Are you kidding me?
But that is how the cookie crumbles.
There is a lot of sexual harassment out there.
And it takes a lot to stand your ground in this industry.

But i am in this industry.
And i have to be honest with you, i have great role models and friends to look up to.
She is not in the entertainment industry per se, but my sister is a driven, brave and innovative business woman and i have been taking tips from her (without her knowledge oh)
Bobby Taylor is into PR and she is passionate and fierce and driven.
Emem Ema is gearing up to be an entertainment mogul and she is so smart and focused, it's not even funny.
Osagie Osarenkhoe is a young, dynamic female who owns her own Management company already. WORD!

I love these girls, and i am glad that they do what they do.

For me, i would say that there are ... things i have learnt SO FAR. More lessons will come i am sure
- You are a woman.
Don't apologise for it. But don't dwell on it either.
- Shake hands firmly, maintain eye contact, and don't be the girl whose head they want to pat; be the girl whose opinion counts.
This rule is harder for me. I swear, i am a typical daddys girl and i am so used to all that feminine wiles b.s. I like to bat my eyelashes, and speak like a little girl. But now, i am learning to show that i am cute, but maa mi, i can do business as well
- Respect yourself.
Yes, you will have crushes and fall in love, but you do not need to sleep with all the guys on the football team to get ahead. learn to seperate what you do genuinely for 'love' (lett us all throw up collectively), and what you do so you can get your name in the paper!

Like i said, these are the things i have learnt so far, and i am still learning, falling and starting all over again.

Tosyn Bucknor
Remember me as an individual.
Remember me as a Yoruba, Lagosian from Nigeria
Remember me as a woman.
But remember me as TOsyn

Baz Luhrman and I dispense advice

The first time i listened to 'Everybody Should Wear Sunscreen' by Baz Luhrman on Rick Dees show, i thought to myself, "What sound advice this is!".
I suppose anyone can sit down and give u nuggets of wisdom, but every line here seemed to make sense.
And if only one could take it all in and apply it!

Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of '97,
Wear sunscreen. If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis or reliable then my own meandering experience.

Okay, it starts off funny, and straight away, you know this is not a song that sits on its own high horse!

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, nevermind, you won't understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded, but trust me in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.

One of the reasons i try to do almost eveything my spirit and soul lead me to do, is because i do not want to wake up when i am 5o, and regret NOT doing something.
A lot of times, we forget how powerful we are, what strength lies in being YOUNG.
The mind stays active forever i believe, as long as you keep stimulating it; but the body will shut down. So while the mind and the body are active, why not give them something to talk about?

Oh, and this is so right.
When i look at pictures of myself in secondary school or university, i really have to ask myself,
"Kini Big Deal?".
Cos back then, i might have thought i was not looking great, but the pictures tell me i was fab. And no, you are never as fat as u imagine!

Don't worry about the future, or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum.

Cos really, what does worry acheive?

The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind: the kind that blindsides you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.

This line makes me laugh.
For in its own way, it is true you know?

Do one thing every day that scares you.

It is not that easy oh.
Not just something you are uncomfortable with, but one thing, every day that totally scares you?
I have tried to obey this instruction.
It might be saying stuff that scares me, ldoing something that scares me, or going somewhere that scares me.
BUt i broaden that; i do not focus on 'fear'. Sometimes, i do one thing that i would normally not do, or react in some way i would usually not react.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts; don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Never. Be. Reckless. With. Peoples. Hearts.
And please o ye people, DO NOT allow other people be reckless with yours.
For we allow people have control over us.
We allow them hurt us, we allow them break our hearts, we allow them make us feel small, we allow them do anything. But if we do not give them that power, then they cannot take it!
But remember, don't go around hurting people either.

Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long, and in the end, it's only with yourself.

SPEECH brother!
I mean, this is word.
Jealousy just kills you, you know. It is like this black ball in your heart that won't move. And when you let go, you realise that you don't know why you took yourself through all that.
And as for the race being only with yourself, that is the ultimate truth my friends.
I mean, why are you trying to be richer than... as opposed to rich?
Prettier than...
as opposed to Pretty?
Why do you want to get the promotion before...
Instead of just getting your promotion.
Life might be a competition and a race, but it is with only yourself.
And here is a quote i live by-


Remember compliments you receive; forget the insults. (if you succeed in doing this, tell me how).

Ha. Ha. Ha.
He gives you great advice, but in the same breath, he lets you know that he does not in any way, think it is easy.
Why do we spend time mulling over some insult we were given, but then quickly forget when people give us compliments?
How come if ten people tell us our bag is nice, and one person says they don't like it, then we focus on that one person?
What is it about us that makes us yearn more for the put down than hang on to the holding up?
I ask questions even i have no answer to, or antidotes for.
So i will say as well, when you succeed, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters; throw away your old bank statements.
Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives; some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.
Get plenty of Calcium. Be kind to your knees -- you'll miss them when they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40; maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary.

I so want to get married.
But maybe i won't
ANd is it such a bad thing people?
Who knows what lies ahead?
WHo knows what's best?
Thankfully, GOD knows.

Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself, either. Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else's.

When you do something right, enjoy it. THen move on.
When you make a mistake, rue it, then move on.
Stop hanging on to every victory and every setback.
Since we can never be certain, any decision we make could have gone either way, and you do not know what lies further down right?
SO remember, there are no good or bad or perfect decisions; just choices that work.

Enjoy your body: use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or what other people think of it; it's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.

Dance...even if you have no where to do it but in your own living room.

Read the directions (even if you don't follow them).

Do not read beauty magazines; they will only make you feel ugly.

AMEN to that brother!

Get to know your parents; you never know when they'll be gone for good.
Be nice to your siblings: they're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but what a precious few should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps and geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard.
Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Since i live in Nigeria, i will say this for i firmly believe it.
Live in Lagos once, Live in Abuja once.
I however fear that neither city lets you go once they get a hold of you!


Accept certain inalienable truths: prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old; and when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble, and children respected their elders.

We always sit around and talk about how the kids growing up now aren't going to enjoy certain things, and are more exposed than we were.
We remember NEPA fondly, and think about when coke was N20.
And then we listen to our parents talk about their time.
Brother, let us just say, that conversation happens from generation to generation!

Respect your elders.

Respect your elders.
In some situations, it is not that easy, but respect your elders.
But someone please tell me, who are my 'ELDERS'?

Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse, but you never know when either one might run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you are 40, it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia; dispensing it is a way of wishing the past from the disposal--wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts, and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me, I'm the sunscreen.

Trust US on the sunscreen.

Thursday, May 15, 2008


I've been tagged!!!
Here are the rules the person who tagged you: MS MINX
2. Mention the rules in your blog…
3. Tell about 6 unspectacular quirks of yours...
4. Tag 6 following bloggers by linking them…
5. Leave a comment on each of the tagged blogger’s blogs letting them know they’ve been tagged...

Just to let everyone know that i hate things like this
I hate chain mail,
I hate being compelled to do stuff
But MS MINX is family

1. I think i might have a bit of OCD cos i am forever needing to do things at least in pairs.
If i wring my hands, i need to do it again or i will just keep thinking about it.
If i push my glasses back unto my face, then i have to do it again.
And then again.

2. I obsess over food.
Not all the time. Most times, i am the least fussy eater you would ever meet.
Other times though, i obsess
Like, i could spend a whole NIGHT (and i am not exaggerating) craving something and then obsessing over exactly what i would eat the next day.
So for example, i could repeat to myself like a mantra
"Cappucino and two doughnuts from Chocolat Royale"

3. I sometimes send text messages to myself

4. I like to be colour coordinated. All the time. Even when you can't see it.

5. I ALWAYS wear green.

6. My best and worst conversations are with myself.
Before i sleep, i go into that world where i am awake but i am living an alternate life. There, i am usually always in love, always famous.



Wednesday, May 14, 2008




The dress she has on is really pretty, we love the detailing at the top. She complements it well with fab earrings and a trendy hair-do. He also steps out in understated style.
We do not know what the story is here, but they show that sometimes, the best accessory, is the date on your arms

Its the layered skirt that turns this dress from simple to glam

We hope they had fire trucks on standby cos TITI is smoking hot!

We love the shirt (and the tasteful show of cleavage), we love the pencil skirt, we love the belt, we love the bag, we love the shoes, we love the legs, we love the hat, we love the look.

But we bet you already figured that out!

For us, colour is fantastic!
We love the red and the yellow.
We just wish she had given the bag to a friend before taking the picture!
But kudos on the bold choice of colours!

We love the dress, the white belt, and though it's a hard sell, we think she pulls the slung over bag off!

One is simple, the other is simply dramatic. Both achieve their aim.
We like the refusal to conform to fashion rules!

Five of the UNRULIES are pictured here totally setting the pace. From the strapless and stylish JBL dress that Lola carries off so effortlessly, to Chris who looks dapper in a CLOTHSENSE ensemble, to Lamide with the dazzling smile and red belt to break the monochromatic look, to Tosyn in a dramatic top, and Noble in 40's paperboy glamour.

The simple monochromatic look is given a dash of colour with the hair, the make up and the glow.

This outfit ticks ALL the right boxes!
I love the monochrome look, and the hat completes it to a t!

Here i am looking Rock Glam...
even if i say so myself.
I do not know if the bag was the right choice in the end; i wanted a splash of colour, but i keep looking and thinking its off.
But then again, thats cos i love to match die!

For me, the sexiest female on the night! I love the way the dress fits snugly.
Really, the LBD never looked so perfect, and it is no surprise that it is from the YEMI O couture line. Yemi Osunkoya rocks!
And as for Lola, the smile, glam eyes and vibrant lip colour dont hurt either

I am so loving Funke's goth take on a night out.
The eyes are smoky, dark and fab and the dress is brilliant!

Here is DJ Sose with one of my favourite looks on the night!
I think that with this face, the clothes nor accessories don't matter; the tattoo does what its meant to do
Just hope its not permanent though!

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

These Genes

THESE GENES; the Sickle-Cell Project

What I Am Loving At The Moment; Early MAY

Forgive me,
It’s just that I was born with a Diva Attitude.
I therefore assume everyone wants to know what I care about!

So, it is only the first week or so in May but I am already loving a lot!

While I am not yet done with the 9ice album by a long mile, and while I am looking forward to the new album by the kokomaster, I have suddenly discovered new loves.
At the moment, I am loving
- BLEEDING LOVE by Leona Lewis.
- MICHELLE, and LOVE SHOULD LAST and LAND OF THE RISING SUN by Etcetera. If you still have not heard or seen this artiste perform, I have to ask you, WHY NOT. Now that I am calmer, I can then say, please check WWW.MYSPACE.COM/ETCETERAALIVE
- NO AIR by Jordin Sparks featuring Chris Brown. It is so surprising to see someone from American Idol have such an instant hit!
- NAETO C. I swear, you should know his ‘P’. I love this dude and might become a stalker but I am reigning it all in! But honestly, you should pick a copy of the album when it comes out because if ‘Kini Big Deal’, ‘Lagos City Hustle’ and ‘Ashawo’ are anything to go by, that is going to be a definitive hip-hop album.
- SUMMERTIME by the truly new, New Kids on the Block. They are back folks! Ladies, you know you all had crushes on at least one of them. I think I loved Joey and Jordan Knight. You should see their pictures; they look even dishier than way back then.

Apart from the fact that ‘MEN IN TREES’, the zany little show that could is back (Writers strike crippled production), I am hanging at the edge of my seat for a little known show (here at least), known as, ‘THE CLOSER’.
The humour is on point my people, the storylines are believable and sometimes knock your socks off, the characters are beautiful and funny, and it is such a great police drama that others pale in comparism for me.
If you can, try and watch an episode will you?

While my events usually include concerts and award shows, this time, my favourite event was a wedding!
It was Yemi Osindero’s wedding on Thursday and it was more than a wedding, it truly was an event! I loved it for the people I met, and old friends I got reunited with. I loved it because UNRULY Gbemi Olateru-Olagbegi co-anchored it. I loved it because DBanj and Dare Art Alade performed. I loved it because I wore my red dress (which I can never wear again by the way) and was told I looked beautiful. (There was also alcohol at the event though, so maybe I should not believe everything I hear).

I have not seen anything new lately so I might as well talk about the not-so-new.
I recently saw ‘CRASH’ (featuring Terence Howard, Ryan Phillipe and Sandra Bullock) again, and also, ‘THE LAST KING OF SCOTLAND (with an award winning performance by Forest Whittaker, and the ever sexy in his Englishness, James McAvoy delivering a stellar performance).

It still has to be the collective that keeps me sane/

My people
Fellow countrymen
Weddings are a fabulous place to meet men!
Just be careful that they are not
- Married!
- Leaving the country the next day, or
- Only great fun when they are DRUNK!

I think I have wrapped my current dream up. Ended with us living happily ever after, a la Cinderella.

I love life.
Even when it keeps me home with the flu.

Oh ye people of blogsville, please let me know what YOU are loving at the moment!

Mariah! NKOTB! MADE!

Hello oh ye people of Blogville.
Thanks for always swinging by and leaving comments and if you have not been leaving comments…well here is a wonderful hint!

I usually do Entertainment News, and have my fill with Naija stuff, but today, I am going international.

Now, I do not usually go international, but sometimes, you just have to sit up and say, ‘WHAAAAT?’

You know, like in those moments when Mariah Carey decides that now that she is out of rehab and about to get into the third phase of a slamming career, the only other thing she needs, is NICK CANNON. And not as a boyfriend, but as a husband she married after a whirlwind romance in the Bahamas.
Okay, noone should tell me I am crazy again because I always meet guys and want to marry them the next week. I mean, if Renee and Mariah and Britney can do it, what more proof do I need that it is the sane thing to do?

And while we are international, here is heartwarming news.
From the SPICE GIRLS to those five guys that rap, the comeback has become the new music ‘do’.
But I have strangely been unmoved.
Until now.

For I must admit.
Way before I knew what a ‘crush’ was, they were my first.

Yes people, the NEW KIDS ON THE BLOCK are back!
Oh Lord help us.
I am ‘HANGING TOUGH’ but that is just till I see them because they surely are, ‘THE RIGHT STUFF’. The new single, ‘SUMMERTIME’ is out now and I can’t wait to see Jonathan, Donny, Joey, Danny and Jordan, again!
Just so you know by the way…
JONATHAN KNIGHT is the oldest ‘kid’ and is now a Real Estate Developer.
DONNIE WALHBERG is not only an actor, but is also MARK WAHLBERG’s brother. You know, MARKY MARK?
DANNY WOOD has worked as a music producer
JOEY McINTYRE embarked on a solo career (anyone remember, ‘DON’T U EVER WISH U WERE SOMEONE ELSE, U WERE MEANT TO BE…’Yes, he sang the hit single, ‘STAY THE SAME’) and also got some acting roles!
JORDAN KNIGHT is Jonathan’s younger brother and he continued to make music.

Okay, I had to do research on this by googling all of them and I am kind of drooling all over the keyboard now so you might as well just check out
Ah, but we are all grown up now oh!

Am I really calling this ‘Entertainment News’?
For I might as well have called it, ‘NKOTB REUNION NEWS AND OTHERS’
Ah well!

Just so you know though…
‘MADE’, the magazine for Made Men, will be throwing a party on Saturday the 10th of May. Now only is it a launch party, but it will be the debut of the specially written song by Storm artistes (Ikechukwu, Naeto C and GT the Guitarman), plus, the video shot last weekend.
We happened to be backstage at the video shoot at a private beach, directed by someone I worked with on the Apprentice Africa.
We can’t wait for the party, and watch out for the gift bags; we hear they may feature some ‘THESE GENES’ goodies!

Okay people of blogsville, as I have now taken to referring to you.
Read the next blog, the one on things I am loving at the moment (yes, still with that darned diva attitude jare) and leave your comments to let me know what you are loving.

We are off now to watch 9ice on Star Quest!